Pear-Shaped Day

Do you ever have days like this? Where everything sucks and everybody’s piling on you?  That was my day. Made of suck.

First, Henry had late start at school which I always, always hate. It is totally inconvenient. Maggie & Steven never have this, so they have to be at school at 8:00 or so. Usually, Henry starts at 8:30, so I can just go to his school and wait. On late start days, I have to go back home and wait so I can get him there at 9:30. Inevitably, I’ll get working on something and end up being late. As it was today. I couldn’t find my phone before I left, so I had to go back home and get it after taking Henry to school before Steve & I ran an errand. Oh,  yeah, Steve took the day off because Henry’s IEP was this afternoon and he wanted to be there.

We run back home & I get my phone (after calling it from the land line because I couldn’t find it) and we head out. We had to go back down near where we used to live so Steve could pick up this office chair he had repaired. Off we go to do that and when we get there, I wait in the car for FORTY-FIVE MINUTES waiting for Steve to get the chair. Now it’s nearly noon and we have to GO to get to Henry’s IEP on time. I greatly dislike having to rush – almost as much as I hate being late.

On the way home, we start discussing our washer/dryer debacle. When we moved into this house, we bought a new washer/dryer because the ones that were here were broken. I went to do the first load and the washer flooded the room. We got the Duet sport models because that’s what we could afford. They were 3.3 cubic feet and 6.7 cubic feet, respectively. They worked great but lately, it’s been a trial and half. It was taking 2-3 cycles to dry anything and, since they seemed smaller, I couldn’t wash enough at a time. Seriously – 3 towels were all I could wash at a time and it would take at LEAST 2 cycles to dry them. I had talked about it with Steve to see what solutions there might be and the things he said were either things that didn’t make sense to me or I had already done. But, it boiled down to the fact that I was only getting maybe 3 loads/day done and, with a family of 6, I was constantly behind and getting nagged about people needing clothes. But I couldn’t do the laundry any faster.

I thought perhaps the problem was that the appliances were not big enough to handle our laundry load. I talked with my mom about it and, since they were already buying my brother a washer/dryer for his birthday, they offered to do the same for me. So, after some shopping and bargain hunting, I decided on the 4.5 cubic foot Samsung steam washer and 7.4 cubic foot Samsung steam dryer. I found them on sale at Sears and we ordered them. And I was much anticipating the end to my laundry woes. They were delivered on Friday and installed with no problems. I delightedly started my first load and did a dance of housekeeping bliss. Then I came downstairs and realized that the clothes WERE. NOT. DRY. Thus began my dance of wailing and gnashing of teeth. Because I realized that the problem probably was (and had been) a blockage in the venting somewhere.

Since I know less than nothing about all this, I called Sears back and set up an appointment for a repair dude to come out and check out the problem. On Monday. Lo and behold, there’s nothing wrong with the dryer. Nay, the problem, as he informed me with a big fistful of lint and hair, lies in the dryer ductwork. Apparently, the entire venting ductwork is PACKED with lint. Like, it isn’t even REACHING the outside. Apparently, he pulled off the duct going into the back and just reached in and pulled out a big clump right there. And….yeah. I reached up as far as I could reach and pulled out 5 complete fistfuls. And that’s only the first 2-3′ of ductwork. So I called a service to come out and clean them out.Then fell into a depression because I gave up my birthday and Christmas to get a washer & dryer that I didn’t really need. I mean, they’re nice and it’ll be great to be able to do big loads or wash coats, pillows and comforters; but I didn’t NEED it like I thought I did.

So, Steve & I were talking about this and he shares that he thought this was the problem, but he didn’t push it because, apparently, I can’t be talked to. He was convinced that I had my mind set on new appliances and didn’t want to hear anything further. Which isn’t true. I simply didn’t understand what he was talking about because I don’t know anything about this stuff. When he mentioned the “lint trap”, I thought he meant the one in the dryer itself, which I clean after (and sometimes during) each load. Since there was not any buildup or anything around the vent to the outside, I assumed it was clear. So, not only did I fail at good household management, but apparently I’m also impossible to talk to.

Then we had Henry’s meeting and, while it wasn’t as bad as it could have been, much of the focus was about his behavior problems (throwing, hitting, scratching, kicking) and the fact that he doesn’t know how to play with toys. And we’ve missed the “window” where it’s easier to teach them these things. Because I didn’t do enough with him when he was 2, 3, 4 years old. And, because I’m the stay at home parent, that means I fail at parenting a special needs child. So, now I need to work in time every day to give him sensory play, do flashcards and teach him how to play with his toys. On top of all the housework I’m trying to keep on top of, regular day-to-day life and caring for a nearly 3 month old. Because William will totally understand why I can’t feed him because I’m doing flashcards. So – there’s my Fail #2.

After I pick up the kids, I run to Walmart to get a couple of things and see if they have some things I can use for Henry. Steven wants to go in with me because he has $2 and he has to spend it RIGHT NOW. We get what I need and I talk him into not spending his money until we get to the checkout and he has to have cotton candy in a plastic bucket. I get a couple sandwiches from Subway for our dinner and forget to order a Slushee for Steven. He asks about it as we’re walking out and I apologize and say I forgot. He gets all attitudinal and starts telling me how disappointed he is in me because all I do is forget. Since I won’t go back and get it, he’s totally peeved at  me and lays into me, verbally. I spend the next 5 minutes rebuking him for talking to me that way and tell him he needs to get over it. But, I’ve been told. Fail #3.

I got a sandwich for Maggie, but apparently it isn’t what she wants. She hates sub sandwiches and I “should have asked her before I got that”. Which means I should have come out to the car, asked her if Subway was okay with her and then GONE BACK IN to get it. Cue moody, sulky, annoyed teenage girl who hates me because I thought she’d like a ham sandwich. I even told her that she didn’t have to eat it, she could have something else, like tortollini, at home, but she was appalled that I wouldn’t check with her before buying dinner. Mom, you FAIL #4

As we drive home, William starts screaming because his schedule is off and he hasn’t eaten for over 3 hours. He’s furious and is going to make sure we all know it. Fail #5.

So…today, everyone in my family made sure I knew how very, very much I suck and fail at life in their eyes. Needless to say, on the way home, I cried. I’m tired and frustrated and busting my hump trying to keep it all together and do my jobs right & well and everyone thinks I’m a fail. So, today has gone completely pear-shaped.

Tomorrow is bound to be better. Right? RIGHT?!?

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