And so we say goodbye to another year…

…to another year. The fact that it’s 2007 tomorrow is simply unfathomable to me. These are dates that were only seen in science fiction novels & we’re living in them. It’s totally freaky, y’all.

So, this week. We’ve all been sick still all week. This miserable upper respiratory thing with sinus pressure that is not of the Lord. I’ve never had sinus pressure like this. I honestly think my left eye is just going to pop right out. But, life goes on, and so we forge ahead. Thursday was Henry’s appointment with his ENT doctor man – the super ENT that it takes 2 months to get an appointment with. We’ve been having troubles with his ears – his left one specifically, with what seemed to be repeated ear infections. Since he has tubes, it would show as just lots of bloody drainage out of his ear. We got him on Amoxicillin back at the beginning of November for it & also had Cipro ear drops. It cleared up & then came back twice. Since I knew the appointment was coming up, I didn’t keep going back to his pediatrician because they’re not terribly good at determining when he has ear problems – due to his odd ear canal. So we went in hoping to figure out what was going on. And figure it out we did. He did a cursory exam and then called for “the papoose”. Which we both love & hate. Love because it eliminates any need for restraining him. Hate because it invariably means something’s going to hurt – necessitating restraint. So, they papoosed him and doctor looked into his left ear. “I think the tube is in the canal,” he said. So, he picks up, tries, and puts down 4 different instruments in an attempt to extract the tube. Henry starts totally screaming. And the doctor is struggling to remove the obstruction without hurting him. When he finally gets it out, for a second I thought it was an earwig or something. It was way too big to be in his ear. Apparently, the tube came out and lodged in the canal during (or before) his ear infection – forming a big wad of ear tube, blood clots and wax. That was difficult to remove. No wonder the infection didn’t go away. The drops couldn’t get past the obstruction. And Henry continues to scream. Switch ears – same routine with only slightly different results. Tube was out & in the canal, somewhat difficult to remove, more screaming, out comes a big grody, creepy thing. By now, Henry is completely out of control – one big sobbing, screaming, snotty mess that’s madder than the blazes.

We had to go from there to check the pressure in the ears and get a reading. The screaming continued for the whole 15 minutes we waited for the audiologist, had the timpanogram, waited after the timpanogram and went back to the exam room. There’s apparently fluid behind the left eardrum, so we have to go back in a month. And probably have the ear tube surgery again. Yippie-ki-yay. The good part about the visit was that we had to wait so long in the waiting room, that we made friends. There was a family with a boy Steven’s age, a smaller girl and a toddler. Then a family with 2 daughters – one was 13 & had Down Syndrome and the other was 9. Everyone started playing with one another – Steven was showing his Leapster Animal Genius game to the boy & the boy’s mom. Maggie hooked up with the 9 year old girl and they talked about having a sibling with DS and made friends. Henry made friends with everyone. So even though we had to wait over an hour for our appointment, it was worth it.

Steven had a huge milestone yesterday. He asked for and got a haircut with no fussing at all. It was mind-boggling to Steve & me. It started with him taking scissors and cutting his hair “like Gabe” (a boy in his class). Since it was a bit….haphazard, Steve told him we’d have to cut his hair. So, he took off his shirt & got the clippers out. He started to wig out, but then you could see him decide that he was going to be okay with it. He sat on the edge of the tub and let Steve clipper his hair. With no fuss. It was amazing. Then, he took the clippers and did Steve’s hair. How cute is this?  My little Baldy Sours.

Can I share a little glimpse into how selfish I am?? Yesterday, I get an email informing me that, due to observance of President Ford’s passing, there will be no mail service on Tuesday. So…no mail on Monday for New Year’s. And no mail on Tuesday. I flipped. I went into this ridiculous tirade about how it makes no sense at all – President Ford didn’t invent the mail or anything – why do we have to miss another day of mail because he died. All Steve could do was laugh at my self-absorption. See…I love the mail. I love getting the mail. I love looking through the mail. I’m disappointed if the mail is only bills & junk. The thought of going 3 days in a row without mail makes me want to dig the bugs out of my arm. Yes, internet, mail is like crack to me. I’m so selfish.

Then, today, I learned that our music pastor is leaving. In 2 weeks. Another one down. Our church is chewing them up & spitting them out, it seems. I’m so incredibly discouraged. I was just starting to feel like things were going to be okay, that the new year was going to bring some great final decisions for the music and that we would be going forward with renewed vigor. Instead, we get to start all over. I know it’s all going to be okay and that it’s all part of God’s plan, but I am discouraged. Plus, it looks like our church will be moving toward having 2 services – traditional & contemporary. Which I hate. I know many, many churches do it & do it successfully, but I really dislike it. I feel like it promotes disunity in the church – instead the church being one body all worshipping together, you have, in essence, 2 churches in one building. There are people you’ll never know because they go to “traditional” and you go to “contemporary”. I don’t intend to belittle anyone’s preference – I don’t really care what kind of music you prefer. I just have always liked our church because even though we had 2-3 services, they were all the same. Everyone was worshipping together, for all intents & purposes. It just makes me sad. Just not where I want to go to church. Anyway, I’m really sad Joseph & Kimberly are leaving. I feel like I didn’t really even get to know them – and that’s my fault. When they came, I was so exhausted and thankful that I kind of disappeared. I didn’t give them the support I should have. I just wasn’t there to help them with the transition. And I’m so, so sorry about it. I don’t think that my involvement or lack thereof was enough to make a difference in whether they stayed – I’m not that arrogant – but I wish I had had more to give.

So….yeah. It’s been a wild year. Insane. Exhausting. Inspirational. Emotional. I sit on the edge of knife between wishing this season of life would go more quickly & wishing it would just STOP because the kids are getting away from me. I always remember what my great-grandmother used to say, “This, too, shall pass.” I want it to….but I don’t. I hope that this year I can find more peace. That I can trust more fully in the Lord and His plans for my life and not let myself get so beat down by the everyday. That I can praise Him – even in the storm. ‘Cause it’s a choice, you know? As the song goes, “You give and take away…You give and take away. My heart will choose to say….Lord, blessed be Your name.” That’s my prayer for all of you out there this coming year. May you see God in the details. May you praise Him in your storm. May you trust in His plan, His path, His promises. And may I, too.